Being Single

"you're single !!! Ho hi nahi sakta !!!"


This was facebook.. and I was chatting with a friend/acquaintance of mine..
The college hadn't restarted yet and hence it was an era of  fokatgiri at its extreme...
Insomnia at its peak.. hours of nothingness.. and a blissfully empty mind usually gave way to such futile conversations...


This comment however had my attention..
and I was like.. "kyun ???"


"Ab tujhe apni taarif sunani hai ??? :P", came the reply..


"nahi.. I'm genuinely curious..", I typed back... 


And I was.. It was not just the sentence that had my curiosity aroused... It was the finality with which it was delivered that made me wonder.. "ho kyu nahi sakta"..


The reply that I got was as follows..
" you're smart.. intelligent n 'quiet' beautiful.." (I never figured out whether it was meant that I come across as quiet.. or that I was 'quite' beautiful) ;)


"so.. mai single nhi ho sakti ??" I retorted back..


"yeah.. unless u're mad.." came the ambiguous and baleful reply.. 


The above mentioned conversation no doubt gave me a boost.. but it also sent me thinking...
Can anyone not be single in this era ???
And why has being committed become such a taboo...???


guys and girls claim to be "in love" at an age that they don't even know what it means to be in love... Having a boyfriend/girlfriend is the trend of the day..
Let me clarify.. Its not like I'm an anti cupid sadist.. (In fact I happen to know people who have a special setting with the little toddler) ;)
I've got nothing against love... its truly a beautiful feeling... :)
I just don't believe its something to be flaunted !!!
It happens when its meant to happen.. And to get into a relationship just because everyone else is.. Is plain stupid !!!
It requires profound level of maturity to handle it.. 

Being in love also doesn't mean you fade off from the adjoining world into one composed entirely of two people...
I have seen people change once the cupid strikes..
Their entire world revolves around each other...
Their level of engrossment makes me wonder... Don't they need a buffer ??? What if after the initial period of infatuation, it wears off ??? What if you don't find each other as interesting as you used to ?? What if boredom seeps in ??? What then ???
And even if you manage to not run out of talks.. what happens if god forbid things don't work out in d manner you had envisioned they would... how do you cope ???


Then its "exit" love.. and "enter" variety of pages on facebook like.. "you'll never know how much you hurt me" "I will always love you" and what not...
love is supposed to be the most amazing feeling..
so why rush into it ???




Earlier people used to take time to fall in love.. In our generation it happened in late teenage and early 20's..
5 years isn't a long time.. but it has surely resulted in something of a generation gap.. ( I can't even imagine what the situation will be 15-20 yrs..)
now love happens at the age of 14-15... call it the side effect of rapid mordernization...
A part fault lies with the elders too..
as soon as the kid starts with preschool.. elders tease the kid about the "girl" friend in the class... tv shows, movies, internet, news don't help the cause either.. so bada hote hote ye toh hona hi hai...


I've digressed... started with something and ended up blabbering about something else entirely... ;)
Getting back to the point...
Its great if you find that designated special someone.. 
But there is nothing wrong with being single in the meanwhile...
Just because you are smart, intelligent and beautiful doesn't imply that there "needs" to be someone..
Love isn't about showing off.. It isn't about clinging to each other 24 x 7 ( I don't mean this literally) ..
Its the knowledge that there is someone out there.. who's always gonna be there for you...
who likes you for who you are.. as you are..
Its about understanding and maturity to give each other the required space while being there always..
It makes you want to be a better person than you are.. motivates you to makes things better.. changes your perception of things.. and manages to put a silly smile on your face everytime...

Thats what I believe it to be.... ( yet to discover how true that is)
In the meanwhile.. I'm happy observing things from a distance..
Do give it a try if you happen to be an occasional fokat person like me...
It gives you interesting insights into human psyche..
its said smart people learn from their mistakes.. but intelligent ones learn from others experiences...
On that intelligent note.. its me signing off..
for those in love.. keep loving... for others.. keep looking... ;)
Viva la vida.. :)